The Red Door
by c.i.t.y.z
Summary: I hate that door and everything it represents. He reminds me every day of what it stands for. He isn't my father but I must obey or else it'll be the end of me.
1. Chapter 1

_The red door.._

_I hate that door and everything it represents._

_He reminds me every day of what it stands for._

_How and why my so-called mother betrayed me._

_When he stole what was once precious to me._

_And the fact that I can't get away._

_No matter how hard I try._

_He isn't my father and he's definitely not my friend._

_But he insists every day that I call him Daddy._

_That I obey everything he says._

_And if I don't?_

_It'll be the end of me. _


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter One

Disclaimer: I am not affiliated in any way with the Twilight Saga or Stephanie Meyer. I don't own any of the characters; I'm just playing with them! If you read, please review!

Warnings: Possible verbal and physical abuse. Sexual abuse but nothing in graphic detail. E/B story eventually. HEA

I was 8 years old when my real daddy died. He was a police officer for the Pheonix Police Department in Arizona. Shot in the line of duty during a hit & run that went wrong. Responding officers were already on the scene when the guy fled and in an effort to be the hero, my dad tracked him to another street and continued in pursuit on foot.

When it was obvious to the criminal that my dad was catching up, he pulled out a 9mm and shot my father multiple times in the chest. He was dead before anyone else arrived.

My mother and I were devastated by the loss. She drowned her sorrow in alcohol and I stayed quiet. I didn't try to get out and be social. I stayed in my room and concentrated on school. On going to college and making him proud.

The first year wasn't the hardest by far. Mom was in denial that first year and when it really dawned on her in the form of his insurance policy, she went ballistic. She started getting drunk more often and when that wasn't enough; she went to the harder stuff. Leftover pain pills from previous surgeries. No matter how old they were, she'd still take them. And after a year of spending all of the insurance money on pills that Doctors wouldn't prescribe, she found a cheaper drug. Heroin.

I became accustomed to the scarce meals and sad excuses for clothing. I'd go to school smelling of body odor and stale cigarette smoke. The kids would poke fun at my tattered clothes and ratty hair. I'd just stare at my feet and continue to make the best of my day.

Then the worst time of our grieving came to a head. My mom didn't work and the money was running out. We had barely a penny to our name and mom needed her fix.

One of the dealers that she bought from, came over to our house when she called him hysterically on the phone. She begged and pleaded with him to make some sort of deal with her. 'I'll do anything, just bring it to me!' were her exact words on the phone.

I was walking to my bedroom when I overheard her on the phone and shrugged my shoulders, thinking nothing of her hysterics. I had grown immune to it and I stayed in my room like I normally do.

Little did I know, that would be the last day of my freedom.

"Bella, get down here! There's someone I'd like you to meet!"

"Okay, mom. I'm coming!" I replied tiredly as I pushed my schoolwork out of the way and made my way downstairs.

I glanced to my mom first and then the person standing beside her. I became suspicious as soon as I saw the guy.

He had stringy blonde hair and blue eyes. He didn't look strung out like my mom did but I could see a different hunger in his eyes; a craving of some sort. And when I walked into the room, I felt like my body was on fire. And not in a good way.

"Bella, this is James. He's one of my friends. You're going to stay with him for a while.."

I stared at her in awkward silence, wondering if I heard her correctly. Surely I didn't.

"What? Why?"

"Bella, I really can't handle you anymore. All you do is sit in your room and do nothing. You don't contribute anything to this house and I can't afford to feed you for free anymore. So... James has agreed to have you stay with him. He's got different things around his house that you can do... To stay busy..." She said hesitately as she fidgeted with her fingers.

She couldn't wait for me to get out of here, obviously.

"Mom, are you serious? I don't want to go with him, I want to stay with you!"

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see James slip something into her hand discreetly. Before I knew it, his firm hand was wrapped around my upper arm and I felt a sharp tug as he started to drag me out the front door.

I think I was in shock because I really didn't put up a fight. I just stared at him in what I'm sure was horror as he pushed me into the back seat of a car.

When he started to walk around the car to the drivers' door, I immediately started to pull on the door handle to get out but he had the child safetly lock in place preventing me from getting out. I started screaming in a panic as he started to drive off, ignoring my screams.

"Why are you doing this? I want to go home! Please, please take me home!"

A sharp sting overtook my face before I could even proccess what he had done. I had never been struck before; not even a spanking by my parents.

Needless to say, after a firm 'shut up or I'll do it again' resounded in my ears, I decided my best course of action would be to shut up.

With tears in my eyes, I nodded slowly and looked down at the carpeted floor of the car. No specks of dirt or food could be found. It was pristinely clean and I wondered if something were wrong with him.

An OCD drug dealer? That was a first.

Was he even a drug dealer?

So many had frequented my house in the past 2 years that I had developed my own idea about them. Dirty, wide eyed and fidgety. He definitely was none of those things.


	3. Chapter 3

Once my crying stopped I fell into a restless sleep and kept waking up in spurts to the passing scenery. The man was still driving and if it weren't for the clock on the radio, I would have no idea how long we had been on the road.

We had been driving a long time and it was lunchtime the next day so we had to have been driving for at least 12 hours. I was clueless to where he was taking me and I hoped that his intentions weren't malicious.

"What do you want to eat for lunch, sweetie?" There was the sweet voice again. Like he was talking to a baby. Or coddling me.

"I don't care..." I replied sadly, knowing what the alternative would bring me. The first time I mumbled or cocked an attitude, I was slapped or hit on the back of my head. I learned quickly to answer him correctly. I wouldn't make that mistake again.

"Ok then. We'll stop at the diner up ahead. But some rules first." Oh god, what now? "No talking unless I speak to you. Don't look at anyone. Act like the good girl I know is in there. And call me Daddy. We wouldn't want anyone to get suspicious, would we?"

"No." I said as I picked at my thumb nail. A hang nail had developed within the past few days and it was a welcome distraction from recent events.

With those words and a silent warning to stay quiet, we pulled into the parking lot of an almost empty diner. He opened the car door for me and when I stepped out, I felt his hand on my lower back immediately; guiding me to the door. We were seated by an older waitress who was none the wiser to my predicament. I guess she automatically assumed we were a father/daughter.

"What can I get you folks today?" she asked politely but obviously she couldn't wait to get off work.

"A pepsi for me and a water for my daughter." She wrote down our drink orders and looked towards him again.

"Would you like to go ahead and order? Or would you like a few more minutes?"

"I'll have a western omelot with salsa on the side and my daughter will have a house salad. No dressing or cheese." I resisted the urge to gawk at him. With no cheese and no dressing, it was hardly a meal. And considering we had been driving over 12 hours with nothing to eat, I needed more than a plain salad. But I knew not to argue so I just stared at the table-top.

Once she walked away, James sneaked a creepy glance at me and smiled.

"We're going to have a lot of fun together, Bella. I promise it'll be nothing like you've ever experienced. You're almost 11, right? No boyfriends?" he asked with an edge to his voice.

I shook my head mutely and looked back at him, afraid to look away.

"That's good. I want you clean and pure. You're mine now."

I didn't understand what he meant by pure and clean but a feeling of dread overtook my stomach at his expression. I still nodded in agreement though.

Once the waitress brought our orders and I had promptly scarfed mine down as if I were starving, we were on the road again.

This time though, he told me to sit in the front seat where he could see me better. We drove for a few hours and once again I fell asleep against the door, oblivious to his weird stares.

When I awoke again, I could feel something touching the side of my leg gently and I woke with a start. I looked down to find his hand on my thigh, rubbing circles with his index finger. He didn't even look my way when I opened my eyes although I'm sure he felt me shiver involuntarily at his touch.

"Don't be scared, Bella." he said as he stared at the road, "I'm the only one you have now. You depend on me for everything. So if you don't do what I want or what I tell you, you won't get what you need."

"Ok..." I replied in a whisper, scared to talk any louder.

"Now," he continued, "Once we get where we're going, there's going to be some ground rules. If you don't follow my rules, you will be punished. Are we clear?"

I replied in the same fashion and stared out the window, trying to ignore his hand going higher as he talked.

"I own you, bought and paid for. No friends and especially no boys. When I tell you to do something, you do it; no questions asked and no hesitance. You talk to no one unless I tell you to. If you go against me, your privileges will be taken. No food, no water, nothing."

I nodded again hoping against hope that he would just shut up.

Finally after 26+ hours of driving, we arrived at a place called Forks, WA. It seemed like a depressing town and I knew I wouldn't like it here. Much less in the company of him.

He talked in length about his plans for me and how he had been watching my mother for years. That once he saw me, he knew he had to have me. He just waited until the right moment.

He knew that my mom was a druggie and after giving her a few samples of his 'product,' he knew he had her hooked. He supplied her for a year and then swept the rug out from under her. Drained her dry until she could bleed no more. And when she became desperate, he said he'd take payment in the form of 'me'.

Pretty crappy deal, if you ask me.


	4. Chapter 4

If you would've asked me what the scariest part of my journey had been so far, I would've told you the moment that he put me into his car.

But since we've been at his house in Forks? I couldn't even begin to explain the scariest part because so much happened within the first two days I have been here.

Once we waltzed into the front door of his home it seemed like a switch had been flipped inside his head. I don't know if it was because he was comfortable with where we were or if he had soundproof walls. But regardless of those things, he started yelling as soon as we walked inside.

"Get upstairs and wait for me. First door on the right." he said leaving me no option to look at my surroundings or get a sense of where we were. "Now!" he yelled.

I ran like my life depended on it and in rectrospect, it probably did. He had already warned me if I didn't do what he wanted. I didn't want to be punished.

So again, I ran to the room and stood at the center of it, unsure of what to do.

A few minutes later, I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and my resolve crumbled. I became a blubbering mess.

"P-Please don't hurt me..." I begged him between sobs.

"I'm not going to hurt you. I'm just going to love you, Bella. You know what love is, right?" he asked as I nodded. "You don't hurt someone you love. Love might sting a little but it never hurts."

"What are you gonna do..?" I asked while trying to look him straight in the eyes like he likes although all I wanted to do was crawl into a hole and die.

He didn't bother to reply and as he walked closer to the bed, staring at it with a pecurliar look in his eyes.

Pointing to the bed and only saying 'sit,' he pulled the thick covers back and prompted me to lay down. I obliged slowly and when I finally laid down, he sat beside me and started to unbutton my pajama top. I started to fight him as he did it but when he raised his hand as if to strike me, I stopped immediately; frozen in place.

What happened next was a nightmare and no matter how many times I opened/closed my eyes, it didn't change what he had done to me. He left almost immediately after he buttoned his pants back into place while I lay there in a sobbing mess.

I tried in vain to clean myself in the bathroom as I cried but even if I had gotten the tinge of blood cleaned off from between my legs, I still felt dirty. Used. I didn't understand what he had done to me but I knew that it was bad and that it hurt tremendously. Everytime I cringed away from him or tried to get up, he'd smack me wherever his hand would be at the time. My butt, side, stomach and face especially were the most damaged places. I could see welts and bruises forming on my body from where he held me in place.

I was still in the shower when he emerged with a plate of food. Again, he didn't stay long and wouldn't look at me. It was a drastic change from the person I travelled on the road with. This person was more distant, cold and un-caring.

Getting out of the shower was another hard thing to do. My legs felt like jello and it was hard to bring my legs over the tall tub. I guess it wasn't made for a 10 year old. It had weird holes all around on the inside and I spied a little button near the middle. I didn't want to know what that was all about so I put a stop to those thoughts.

I walked to the bed to find a plate of toast, eggs, and orange juice. It looked a lot better than the plain salad I had earlier so I dug in almost immediately.

After eating my food, I sat at a bench that allowed me to look out through the window at the neighborhood and for a moment, I felt a sense of normalcy in the action. I would do this all the time at home while doing my homework. I spied a few people going on about their day. I should be out there playing, riding a bike, all kinds of things that children do. But it wasn't meant to be, I guess.

Staring into oblivion, I started daydreaming when I was promptly spooked by the barking of a dog. I looked next door and saw a young boy playing with a dog that looked like a wolf. The boy had copper-red hair and was fairly short although I couldn't be sure from where I was sat. He looked happy and jovial as he threw a stick for the dog to go after. For a moment, I hated him. Envied him. Wished I were in his shoes with no worries.

As if he could sense my stare, he looked up towards my window and spotted me. He waved shyly and motioned for me to come outside. The thought both scared and excited me at the same time. When he didn't get a reaction from me, he cocked his head to the side and held his arms up in a questioning gesture. I shook my head at him sadly and he seemed to know that I couldn't come out. He waved again and took off with his dog across the yard.

How I wished I could experience that freedom.

"Bella! Come down here!"

3333

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, I know this is going by slowly but I want to know if you'd like me to continue in BPOV or would you like me to sneak some EPOV in? Review and let me know, thanks!


	5. Chapter 5

After those first few days it seemed that James had gone into a routine of sorts for our days. He'd wake me up at the butt crack of dawn with a bowl of stale cereal and skim milk, watch me eat and make me take a shower. Sometimes he left me in privacy, other times he'd stay and watch in silence making me feel like some freakshow.

When the shower was over, he'd force me on the bed and 'love me'. That's what he called it anyway. I called it 'bad love' but what do I know? He's a grown up.

He didn't leave me by myself like last time and I wasn't allowed to shower afterwards because he said he liked how I smelled when we were done.

He sat on the bed beside me and grabbed my hand in a tender manner. It shocked me at first but I was smart in not showing my surprise.

"Now Bella... We have to have a talk, ok?" I nodded and just stared at his offending hand wishing I had something I could stab it with.

"You can't tell anyone about the things we do, ok? Others won't understand and they'll try to put us in jail."

"I don't want to go to jail... Mom told me that's a place for bad people.."

"Exactly. And you're not a bad girl, are you Bella? I only took you from your mom because she couldn't handle you. She didn't care. She didn't want you. She wanted you to go away and didn't care how she got rid of you. I saved you. I made sure no one else could hurt you."

I understood in a sense what he was saying was right. Mom never spent any time with me, she never hugged me or told me she loved me after daddy died. Said I was too expensive and lazy to take care of. That I had to earn my way. So.. maybe I'm just earning my way here with James.

Even if the words rang true inside my head, there was still a sense of wrong in it that I didn't understand. Why didn't mom ever talk to me about what boys and girls did together in the bedroom? Maybe if I had known, I would've been ready for his 'love.'

After being stuck in the house with James for two weeks straight, I could feel myself starting to lose touch with everything. He kept drilling the same things in my head every day that he had the day he told me that if we were found out, we'd go to jail until I started to believe him wholeheartedly.

He also started to let me explore the house but there was still limitations on where I could go. I was allowed in the kitchen, living room and bathroom. The basement and his room were off limits. He wouldn't tell me why but I had a sneaking suspicion that it involved 'grown up' things that I didn't want to know about. I never questioned anything he asked or made me do.

We still followed the basic routines of the day but now I was eating breakfast in the kitchen while he sat across from me and stared.

This morning however, I had a question for him and hoped that he wouldn't become angry.

"Daddy?" I whispered shakily. He still hadn't relented on the 'daddy' thing and I still hated him for it. That name was suppose to be reserved for Charlie Swan; not him.

He glanced at me suspiciously and I immediately lost my nerve, staring at my bowl of cereal.

"Yes, Bella?"

"Can I ask you something? Promise you won't get mad?"

He seemed to think it over for a moment and even though I was starting to feel impatient, I never dared to show it. I knew better. At his quick nod, I continued,

"Can I play outside today? I was hoping I could play with some of the kids next door... I promise that's all I'll do..." I said clearly but not too loud in fear that he may think I'm demanding something.

"Bella... You know how I feel about you playing with other kids, especially boys..." At his answer, I nodded sadly and resumed eating. "But.." he continued, causing me to look up again, "If you promise to be a good girl and tell them nothing about us, I'll think it over."

"Yes daddy, I promise! I won't say anything!" It was probably the perkiest I had been since arriving here and I think he knew that because his eyes started to narrow dangerously. I gained my composure at that look and said, "Thank you daddy. You're so nice.." It felt like bile on my tongue as I spoke the words but I knew that in order to have privileges, I'd have to be what he wanted me to be.

He didn't give me his answer for a few days and I began to grow worried that he had changed his mind. But I waited.

And waited.

I made sure to behave extra good these past few days and hoped that it would steer him into saying yes.

I let him 'love' me like he wanted and when he wanted, no matter how much more I died inside at his touch.

I ate all of my breakfast, lunch, and dinner no matter how bad it tasted.

I let him watch me shower every time and didn't shy away from his touch like I usually do.

Maybe I had done something wrong in all of my efforts to do them right?

I didn't know and he gave me no indication.

Another two weeks passed and I just knew James had forgotten about my question. I didn't though. I remembered every second of every day.

We were eating breakfast when he finally looked at me and gestured for me to pay attention.

"I've been thinking about what you asked me a couple of weeks ago and I've decided. Thought I forgot, didn't you?"

I shook my head but didn't answer verbally. I didn't want to say *anything* to make him mad.

"I'll allow it on one condition... You tell NO ONE about what goes on here, are we clear? Like I've told you before, other people won't understand and we'll both be in trouble. You aren't a child anymore. They'll send you to jail for a long time!" I nodded profusely and agreed.

"I won't tell anyone, I promise!

"And also, I don't want you alone with boys. They can't 'love' you like I can. If you let them, you'll be in trouble and people will start calling you a whore. You got it? You don't want to be a whore, do you?" he asked with a strange gleam in his eye. I had no clue what a 'whore' was but I didn't want to be one.

Shortly after the conversation, he let me play outside for the first time in a month. There was a chain link fence around the whole yard with a lock on the gate that I couldn't open but I didn't care. I was just happy to be outside in fresh air, enjoying the sunshine.

The copper-head boy was on his porch, reading a book as I stared in wonder at everything around me. This was a nicer neighborhood than where I lived with my mom.

All of the houses were pretty big and most of them were fenced in like mine, not making me feel like a freak. I spied James standing at the kitchen window watching me like a hawk so I paid attention to every move I made so I wouldn't make him mad.

"Hey! Do you want to play?"

That was the first day I met my best friend, Edward Cullen, in person.

My life had officially brightened a little at his crooked smile.


End file.
